I'm finally an artist, that's why!
This is the only place suitable for a blog like this, but it so needs to be written. I woke up inspired. It's the place, because it's all about me, my real feelings, and I suspect more than a couple of others will relate.
I'll turn 52 within the next week. My real hair colour is - grey. I like to wear bright clothes, because it makes me feel happy. I can't sit in an enclosed office for too long a period of time , because it makes me feel - trapped. I don't like formal rituals and procedures just for their own sake, nor for a reason I can't relate to. I don't like being judged by my cover; I dislike small talk. I pick up peoples' vibes on a deeper level, and we either connect- or don't. To me that's okay, because enough do connect.
And I have more interesting friends as a result. Interesting because they're REAL. And not trying to keep up to some passable expectations of who they should be or what they should look like (within reason, of course!)
I like people who are them-selves.
When I first got into business at the age of around 40, I didn't like people much. I was far too busy trying to live up to the expectations of what 'they' thought I should look like.
And for good reason.
I was formerly a medical technologist, turned time management trainer.
The perfect image thing worked for me: Black suits to train in the corporates ( although I'd only ever worked for the (former) government myself). Perfect hair, cut at all times ( because had I let it grow, it would've become much too bushy, especially in Durban's humidity).Before going to the 'weekly business preview' for the network marketing business I then became absorbed in building, I would fret about how I looked, before leaving... dark rings under my eyes? Cover them quick!
It was all about appearance - me, me me - how I came across. Though to be fair, there was a heart in there that really wanted to help people live their best lives through assisting them to 'manage their time' with my simple proven workshop.
Which worked!
I gained the recognition.But at the expense of other areas of my life: family, and health, and finance (I got myself heavily into debt for the sake of 'keeping up with the Joneses' , such as they were).
Despite all this striving to 'be like them', I never felt good enough. They were always strutting their stuff, bigger and louder ... and more artificially.
They labelled me as 'negative', because they had the positive thinking, and speaking techniques taped. But unfortunately, their hidden lack of integrity eventually revealed itself.
Giving me the best lesson of my life!
Yes, I often wore (and still do) my heart on my sleeve. I was told 'leaders don't do that, people are watching you'.
I may have appeared clumsy and vulnerable at times, but at least people were watching me be REAL. I've never been good at lying or cheating with a straight face.
And that is my saving grace.
Because in this world, I discovered it is not about looking perfect so that everyone admires me on the basis of appearance; nor is it about pleasing every single person I come across. But rather it is about being true to who I really am, serving God first - I absolutely do care about what He thinks of me. People? Ja, I like to have friends - but those who appreciate who I really am.
I'm no longer that person who needs to live up to appearances.
If I look good, it is beacuse I take pride in my own appearance. Not because I have to dress a certain way to be accepted (not). Not because I have to act in a set manner in order to be liked.
Yes, true, sometimes I'm too 'terse', too straightforward and 'I tell it like it is'. However I'm very sensitive about how people are feeling - and I can immediately pick up if they don't like me, or if they couldn't care less. I do try to take peoples' feelings into consideration at all times, but I have also learned to aggressively protect my own self esteem, because, ironically, my ability to help many other people rests on what I think of myself.
'I love me and I approve of me', in the words of Louise Hay, who, herself, triumphed and in the process was able to help many others triumph too!
I had my hair a lovely shade of auburn, having paid the hairdresser for that look. Then the grey hairs appeared. I was meant to go back and have the auburn re-applied. I decided not to, because I need all the money I've managed to salvage, for a trip to Johannesburg at the end of next month, which involves a ten day stay - 2 seminars, and meeting some great, like-minded people up there. I'm investing a lot on developing what's in my head, rather than what's on top of it right now. However, I'm not brave enough to go completely grey (yet?). I wish I had money for both, but I don't want to get into debt. Yep- I wrote the Money Tree course, but personally I'm still working on the roots.
I know there are others in the same boat, because I attended a business meeting (you know the one where they tell you 'give is gain'... ) yesterday, and noticed a few others with similar hair colour . Box colour is easily recognisable because it's all one tone ... I think that particular company must be doing well. My hairdresser is too, though...
It was a toss-up between grey roots, a thousand rand, or the aforementioned. Mmm. I often wish I were a man (most of them don't have to care about their appearance to such an extent) - but then again that's not who God made me to be!
He made me to be me.
The me that no longer fits into the mould I was in ten years ago. The one who's become more 'eccentric' maybe - but defintely more real, and happier in my own skin - even though I get more than the odd passing glance because I do things slightly differently.
The me who wants to collaborate with other trainers/coaches/facilators because I KNOW we all have something unique to offer, so why compete?
And gives me the opportunity to do what I do best, which is write training material with a difference, instead of being scrutinized because I'm not wearing the right suit, or driving the right car. ..
What a waste of creativity!
But the me who takes satisfaction in running seminars with the best individuals as speakers; those who are real, rather than rehearsed. Those who go deeper than the image level.
That's who I'm interviewing for, and thank the Lord, I have found some gems to fit into my programme. And I'm just the producer... the co-ordinator.
You can't find the best real people if you're not real yourself. You attract what you are!
My goal ten years ago was to 'be professional' - and I achieved it ...
Now it's to be real, and the professional will follow. B-)
Tuesday, 26 May 2015
Tuesday, 19 May 2015
A new big idea vs a proven big idea
Both are inspiring, and can help many many people who want to be helped!
'HOW TO GROW A MONEY TREE' a money management course for entrepreneurs:
The new big idea is only launching here in SA. It is a path that has been taken internationally (in a similar way, but not quite the same). SA eductaion requires upgrading, and we are creating a new path here. Just invest a day, and a little bit of money into a transformational learning experience, that will give you a whole new way of thinking about money and entrepreneurship. A collaboration of speakers, trainers and finance speacialists are involved.
Success starts with thinking and knowledge, and then moves onto the doing.
It takes a few like minded leaders to see the value and run with it - and pass it along to others, some of whom will lead others too - into a more enlightened way of learning and thinking and applying.
THE WORLD'S OLDEST AND LARGEST NETWORK MARKETING COMPANY:
Has been abused and misused and confused. And so when we mention the company's name, there are connotations and memories and issues that people need to get over. Maybe they tried it once, or more than once, and clashed ... and crashed and burned.
Join the club:-( But there's a reason I'm still standing! Besides the products being unique, superior, and un-sourcable elsewhere, I know the business works - if you work it. If you go through the pain.
I went through that pain, in conditions far less favourable. I still have a small team going and earn some monthly pocket money from my efforts, even though I've been inactive for a couple of years.
Now I want to speak to people again, but the waters below seem shark- infested. Why? Because I'm procrastining and not taking the leap.
I have huge reasons to jump, but fear being eaten alive.
My confidence will be wobbly in this regard, until I take the plunge - into known territory. And therein lies the problem - I know the territory.
Anyone have a baggage depot I can deposit all those old memories at? And leave them there. I was going to say, lose them - or burn them - but know they may come in useful one day - when I speak to others and encourage them , that they indeed can do this too. If I can they can.
I won't be able to do this, ever - unless I dive into those seemingly shark-infested waters.
Oh, and many others have better ideas, newer ideas, quicker ideas. Making money faster... But how sustainable is it? Sometimes I'm tempted, but I know that the proof of the pudding is in the eating - and my products and my bonuses (whatever amount they've been) have never let me down - the quality, the timing - for years .
And I made a pact. Not to go for anything else.
So I'm kinda stuck.
A dream that no-one else can see?
If I speak, I may build up my team again. If not, I won't.
What's preventing me? Not wanting to waste my time, my money, my efforts, but most of all my emotions - I don't want this taking over my whole life - as it did before.
Protecting myself - remaining resilient, but can't get rid of that yearning to get this done, to build it bigger, bolder, stronger ...
I got rid of a lot of stress in my life through not doing that and through quitting talking to people who messed me around, who got to me. I can't let them get to me. But by nature, entrepreneurs have to sacrifice something anyway, in order to just earn a decent living.
I'm going to go through people - all of whom have their own agendas.
It would've been easier to keep going - under normal circumstances. But ours were not normal - enough said.
But normal can be boring. Overcoming obstacles brings fire and resolve . The conditions are more favourable now than what they were.
I'm going to do this - and the difference is I'm in my own side now. No longer have that little voice in my head that makes me feel guilty, unsuccessful and inadequate.And when she does make a guest appearance, I send her packing.
I'll listen to the CDs, go on CEP, read - yep, what a concept! Attend all the meetings.
Until I'm so fed up with the status quo.
Whatever I want to do I will have to fight for.
Growing a Money Tree... lots of work will need to go into that too. Only it doesn't feel like work when you're passionate. Am I passionate enough to promote my long standing, proven business again too?Yes!
I know what feels right. And sometimes it is all about how you feel. I might be uncomfortable when I dive in again. But it will be a refreshing relief! I know that territory.
I just need to believe in me.
I believe in my ideas. But the thing I need to work on most is self-belief.
It is not all about me anyway.
It is about using what I have to collaborate with others and what they have to create a combined product. One we never could have created alone.
Sure the originator who takes the risk deserves to be paid well for that. But only when she adds immense value to many lives as a result of her efforts. B-)
'How to Grow a Money Tree' Seminar will take place in Durban South Africa on Sautrday 15 August 9am-4.30pm. Tickets are limited to 120. Cost R1250pp, includes lunch, refreshements and a free workbook. Book now to ensure your place! Collaboration leads to transformation in education.
RSVP pauladwyerintune@gmail.com .
'HOW TO GROW A MONEY TREE' a money management course for entrepreneurs:
The new big idea is only launching here in SA. It is a path that has been taken internationally (in a similar way, but not quite the same). SA eductaion requires upgrading, and we are creating a new path here. Just invest a day, and a little bit of money into a transformational learning experience, that will give you a whole new way of thinking about money and entrepreneurship. A collaboration of speakers, trainers and finance speacialists are involved.
Success starts with thinking and knowledge, and then moves onto the doing.
It takes a few like minded leaders to see the value and run with it - and pass it along to others, some of whom will lead others too - into a more enlightened way of learning and thinking and applying.
THE WORLD'S OLDEST AND LARGEST NETWORK MARKETING COMPANY:
Has been abused and misused and confused. And so when we mention the company's name, there are connotations and memories and issues that people need to get over. Maybe they tried it once, or more than once, and clashed ... and crashed and burned.
Join the club:-( But there's a reason I'm still standing! Besides the products being unique, superior, and un-sourcable elsewhere, I know the business works - if you work it. If you go through the pain.
I went through that pain, in conditions far less favourable. I still have a small team going and earn some monthly pocket money from my efforts, even though I've been inactive for a couple of years.
Now I want to speak to people again, but the waters below seem shark- infested. Why? Because I'm procrastining and not taking the leap.
I have huge reasons to jump, but fear being eaten alive.
My confidence will be wobbly in this regard, until I take the plunge - into known territory. And therein lies the problem - I know the territory.
Anyone have a baggage depot I can deposit all those old memories at? And leave them there. I was going to say, lose them - or burn them - but know they may come in useful one day - when I speak to others and encourage them , that they indeed can do this too. If I can they can.
I won't be able to do this, ever - unless I dive into those seemingly shark-infested waters.
Oh, and many others have better ideas, newer ideas, quicker ideas. Making money faster... But how sustainable is it? Sometimes I'm tempted, but I know that the proof of the pudding is in the eating - and my products and my bonuses (whatever amount they've been) have never let me down - the quality, the timing - for years .
And I made a pact. Not to go for anything else.
So I'm kinda stuck.
A dream that no-one else can see?
If I speak, I may build up my team again. If not, I won't.
What's preventing me? Not wanting to waste my time, my money, my efforts, but most of all my emotions - I don't want this taking over my whole life - as it did before.
Protecting myself - remaining resilient, but can't get rid of that yearning to get this done, to build it bigger, bolder, stronger ...
I got rid of a lot of stress in my life through not doing that and through quitting talking to people who messed me around, who got to me. I can't let them get to me. But by nature, entrepreneurs have to sacrifice something anyway, in order to just earn a decent living.
I'm going to go through people - all of whom have their own agendas.
It would've been easier to keep going - under normal circumstances. But ours were not normal - enough said.
But normal can be boring. Overcoming obstacles brings fire and resolve . The conditions are more favourable now than what they were.
I'm going to do this - and the difference is I'm in my own side now. No longer have that little voice in my head that makes me feel guilty, unsuccessful and inadequate.And when she does make a guest appearance, I send her packing.
I'll listen to the CDs, go on CEP, read - yep, what a concept! Attend all the meetings.
Until I'm so fed up with the status quo.
Whatever I want to do I will have to fight for.
Growing a Money Tree... lots of work will need to go into that too. Only it doesn't feel like work when you're passionate. Am I passionate enough to promote my long standing, proven business again too?Yes!
I know what feels right. And sometimes it is all about how you feel. I might be uncomfortable when I dive in again. But it will be a refreshing relief! I know that territory.
I just need to believe in me.
I believe in my ideas. But the thing I need to work on most is self-belief.
It is not all about me anyway.
It is about using what I have to collaborate with others and what they have to create a combined product. One we never could have created alone.
Sure the originator who takes the risk deserves to be paid well for that. But only when she adds immense value to many lives as a result of her efforts. B-)
'How to Grow a Money Tree' Seminar will take place in Durban South Africa on Sautrday 15 August 9am-4.30pm. Tickets are limited to 120. Cost R1250pp, includes lunch, refreshements and a free workbook. Book now to ensure your place! Collaboration leads to transformation in education.
RSVP pauladwyerintune@gmail.com .
Saturday, 2 May 2015
Love can't buy you money
Yep! unfortunately!
For me, love still remains the more desirable of the two. And I am fortunate enough to have that love in my life at the moment - nothing like a good marriage and seeing your children blossom into wonderful people B-)
In my late twenties I would've given up everything to find the right man and have beautiful children. I prayed about it and it happened :-)
I was managing financially; had invested in my own home. I invested greatly in education (and still am), then made some dumb financial moves: by taking out a credit card, and relying on my husband too much.And caring too much about what people think - and being thrown by the misbehaviour of others of the 'rich' ilk... thinking I did not want to be like them - lacking character and integrity.
I painted them all with the same brush - and subconciously developed an aversion to wanting to earn much!
After all, who am I to want love and money?
At the height of my career as a time management trainer and author (such as it was) - I made sure I made just enough, and would inadvertedly get rid of the rest by, amongst other things, creating credit card debt.
Which was a source of stress for months after I came to my senses and cut up the credit card, while refusing to take out any more debt.
I paid it all off in a lump sum from my mom's estate (what an expensive lesson!).
I've been out of debt for a while, but haven't been earning much. A source of great guilt , because I don't want to be relying on my husband, who earns well - but as he pointed out there is a limit to his earnings.
And I've been unsure of: where it's been coming from and where it's been going.I no longer feel in control.
Yet I am sitting on businesses with passive earning potential.
Ok, my book and training business, every Tom, Dick and Harry is trying to do that these days. But I know mine is unique ... but how to get it out there again, now that I've deversified slightly.Ironically that seems like the way to go, but the other business is the real deal! - the one I shied away from, because when you talk about it to people it doesn't look like much - they turn up their noses, and they think they're better than that!
But when you are in the business you don't feel good enough, because the really successful people are genearally of a high calibre - and you know whoever got there worked hard to earn it! Went through the 'rejection' and the - stuff!
So now I ask myself, if I already went through so much in the name of that business, speaking to a multitude of people - then why have I not continued doing it lately; been inactive - given up?
Having done that, and having tried various other routes, makes me realise that The Business is my primary option. The rest of my goals and dreams would be spin-offs once I get that right! Platinum is the place - my true desire. Linked to love...
I will see that word all over until I do it - in spite of the people who've tried to dissuade me; who've told me I'll never be successful; who've laughed at me.
It's better than trying out the rest of everything - knowing where I want to be, but not being able to, because others have stuffed it up so bad, because the business is a wide open business - open to the charletans, the greedy, the liars and the cheaters... the discouragers...
I'm not them, I'm me - and just looking for others like me; the business has a great plan that anyone can follow - if they dare!
It's sad, but no more sadder than life. And the path in SA looks bleaker on any other route or detour.
So I'm prepared to come out of hiding, put back on my armour - and go into battle, big time, in order to achieve the financial freedom that the business offers. Fight for the right - one more time- for my husband, for my daughters, for future generations!
I now know for sure that Love CAN buy me money! Love is a verb - not least of all which is passion, and having the COURAGE of one's convictions! If you want something bad enough you will fight for it!
So why am writing this post then, and opening up to the world (potentially) when most don't really care? To be accountable for my future! No-one can stop me but myself.I will refer to this post over and over and over again when I'm feeling a bit - timid -and remind myself why I'm doing it!
So much more to lose if I don't get back into battle and keep fighting until it's there!
Love can by me money! The capacity to love is limitless ...in that case....
I rest my case B-)
For me, love still remains the more desirable of the two. And I am fortunate enough to have that love in my life at the moment - nothing like a good marriage and seeing your children blossom into wonderful people B-)
In my late twenties I would've given up everything to find the right man and have beautiful children. I prayed about it and it happened :-)
I was managing financially; had invested in my own home. I invested greatly in education (and still am), then made some dumb financial moves: by taking out a credit card, and relying on my husband too much.And caring too much about what people think - and being thrown by the misbehaviour of others of the 'rich' ilk... thinking I did not want to be like them - lacking character and integrity.
I painted them all with the same brush - and subconciously developed an aversion to wanting to earn much!
After all, who am I to want love and money?
At the height of my career as a time management trainer and author (such as it was) - I made sure I made just enough, and would inadvertedly get rid of the rest by, amongst other things, creating credit card debt.
Which was a source of stress for months after I came to my senses and cut up the credit card, while refusing to take out any more debt.
I paid it all off in a lump sum from my mom's estate (what an expensive lesson!).
I've been out of debt for a while, but haven't been earning much. A source of great guilt , because I don't want to be relying on my husband, who earns well - but as he pointed out there is a limit to his earnings.
And I've been unsure of: where it's been coming from and where it's been going.I no longer feel in control.
Yet I am sitting on businesses with passive earning potential.
Ok, my book and training business, every Tom, Dick and Harry is trying to do that these days. But I know mine is unique ... but how to get it out there again, now that I've deversified slightly.Ironically that seems like the way to go, but the other business is the real deal! - the one I shied away from, because when you talk about it to people it doesn't look like much - they turn up their noses, and they think they're better than that!
But when you are in the business you don't feel good enough, because the really successful people are genearally of a high calibre - and you know whoever got there worked hard to earn it! Went through the 'rejection' and the - stuff!
So now I ask myself, if I already went through so much in the name of that business, speaking to a multitude of people - then why have I not continued doing it lately; been inactive - given up?
Having done that, and having tried various other routes, makes me realise that The Business is my primary option. The rest of my goals and dreams would be spin-offs once I get that right! Platinum is the place - my true desire. Linked to love...
I will see that word all over until I do it - in spite of the people who've tried to dissuade me; who've told me I'll never be successful; who've laughed at me.
It's better than trying out the rest of everything - knowing where I want to be, but not being able to, because others have stuffed it up so bad, because the business is a wide open business - open to the charletans, the greedy, the liars and the cheaters... the discouragers...
I'm not them, I'm me - and just looking for others like me; the business has a great plan that anyone can follow - if they dare!
It's sad, but no more sadder than life. And the path in SA looks bleaker on any other route or detour.
So I'm prepared to come out of hiding, put back on my armour - and go into battle, big time, in order to achieve the financial freedom that the business offers. Fight for the right - one more time- for my husband, for my daughters, for future generations!
I now know for sure that Love CAN buy me money! Love is a verb - not least of all which is passion, and having the COURAGE of one's convictions! If you want something bad enough you will fight for it!
So why am writing this post then, and opening up to the world (potentially) when most don't really care? To be accountable for my future! No-one can stop me but myself.I will refer to this post over and over and over again when I'm feeling a bit - timid -and remind myself why I'm doing it!
So much more to lose if I don't get back into battle and keep fighting until it's there!
Love can by me money! The capacity to love is limitless ...in that case....
I rest my case B-)
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